5/7/2012

Well, survived a very, very, very busy weekend. I really thought the MS fatigue MONSTER was going to over take me but, I WON!!!! What do I mean by that? My MS friends - TOTALLY understand but the general public I don't think so. MS fatigue is a symptom of MS - many people with MS deal with MS fatigue. This is not just like because you are busy you are tired.... No, MS fatigue can come on you and over take every aspect. You never know when it may come upon you - so it is a ticking time bomb. But many times - when you are really busy or there is a very stressfull situation it does tend to bring on the fatigue issues to very heighten levels. How do I explain MS fatigue --- how about being SO EXTREMELY tired that you could soil yourself in public with ALL your family, friends, co-workers, ect around you and believe it or not --- you REALLY do not care..... That is how tired you are.... So when someone says to me, how I am tired also... No - it is not the same... This type of extremely fatigue feeling can last for a day or days or weeks. You do not know.... For many people this is the first real symptom of MS. I know with me it was. I was feeling SO extremely exhausted on Mondays after a weekend of activities. Now, we are talking normal weekend activities. But I was just exhausted - it usually took me to Wednesday to feel like I had a full energy tank again. Also mind you - I am in my 20s and 30s at this time. I even went to the doctor at this time. He gave me iron pills... Which yes - my iron was low. But that was not it.... It is a very strange feeling and really hard to verbalize. That is another thing on when I am extremely fatigue - I become 100% NONVERBAL. Believe me, the amount of energy it takes to carry on a conversation is mind blowing...... Anyway, back to the weekend..... I started Saturday with my 12-mile run. (I have one more weekend opportunity before the 10 mile race.) I did pretty good on time - but about a mile before home I fell on the bridge. Why - I know EXACTLY why I was getting tired and there was a change in the surface going from the street to the bridge. And since, I was not concentration as hard as I should be - down I went.... DAMN!!!~!! But no damage -- I fell pretty much on my right part of my face and a small scrape on my knee. There was no real blood or bruising. So I got up walked about 3 yards to get my barrings back and off I went. My time was not horrible but it could have been better without the damn fall. It was 2hr 40mins. I was really hoping to get to the 2hr 30mins mark... Close damn close.... But maybe next weekend!!!!!! I did run Sunday at the Walk MS.... I was going to do the trail (one time is 1.5 miles) a few times but it was severely thundering and lightening. So I chose the safe thing and only did the trail once. At least, I got a little run in. This morning it was all I could do to push a mile on the treadmill. It is the damn MS fatigue monster. I really really do hate him. Believe I say some very choice words to that monster quite often. But I don't know how many would really defend him???? The Walk MS went VERY VERY well - despite our challenges with the MS Society staff members. We even surpassed our goal of $40k before we even started walking. We are the ONLY ones in the state of Illinois that can say that!!!!! Now, how awesome is that!!!!!!! I have also decided that I will NOT be chairperson next year. I am not even sure if I will participate in the Illinois Walk MS. This is due to the fact, of my own time constrants and various interests and aspects from the Chapter office. At least - I am going out on a HIGH note!!!!!! But enough of that.... we are also planning a WONDERFUL evening of pizza and beverages in June.... Thank you, Christine.... Right now - focus is 100% on the run... I have ONE more weekend opportunity to do the 12 miler... I just have to maintain my focus that is so very imperative!!!! As for the fatigue monster, it will let loose here in the next day or two... I just have to ride it out... That is the hard part being patient and letting the fatigue just ride its way out....